Is Cheating the New Normal?

Alright readers…I just couldn’t hold this in any longer
I just had to sit down and write this…
Let’s talk about it

Let’s talk about cheating
& cheaters
& all the rest of those involved

Now…
Before you think any further, yes, I’ve cheated too and been cheated on
So I’ve flipped both sides of the coin

coinflip.gif
and I understand a lot of it…
so even after having been the cheater and the victim myself…I still don’t and won’t condone it

But…
What I want to talk about is staying
Staying after the cheating
It used to be so taboo
You know?
Talking about infidelity in your life and your love
But…
Now we see it everywhere.
Beyonce’ & Jay-Z both made very successful songs about this and I’ve gotten the “oh I’m glad they’re staying together” and the “oh how could you cheat on Beyonce’??” vibes from damn near everyone who wants to talk about it

And well…
Here’s what I have to say about cheating/cheaters/being cheated on…
(Now while you read, remember I don’t speak for the masses, I speak from experience…this is a blog, not a FAQ sheet)

So…
To the cheater – figure your shit out and leave hurting others out of it. I cheated because I was selfish. I wanted more, but didn’t know how to ask for it and I felt guilty for wanting out of an otherwise “good” relationship. It felt awkward, wanting other things for myself when I had it all in front of me (or so I thought)…so anyway, I cheated out of selfishness and that’s just the bottom line. Could I have left? Yes. Should I have left? Double yes. So just leave…figure your shit out and regroup and try as much as you can not to knowingly hurt someone who’s probably not hurting you.
To the victim Figure out why your partner cheated. Ok? Figure that out….because I’ve been there and I know that it eats away at you at night. So, yea, why not figure that out. Let it resonate. Figure out YOUR shit too and still leave.
Now I know…I know…people change, and feelings do too…but make it a point to leave. I didn’t say you can’t go back…but make sure you leave.
Even if only for a moment. It helps you clear YOUR head and makes the cheater work to fix themselves alone, feel the lack of your presence and hopefully fix what they broke…and if you stay gone, you’ve made the right choice for you and your happiness.
The the person the cheater is cheating with– Well damn…I haven’t figured out your side of the pillow yet, but just leave taken folks alone and find someone worth the time and attention that you deserve as a full and complete human being. Don’t expect too much…the saying is true in my eyes “how you get em is how you lose em” (shrugs)

So while the world is not black is white…it is what you make it…and to all of those who made it through, big ups ‘cuz the sh*t ain’t easy…and to those who made it out, bigger ups ‘cuz leaving is enough harder.

So I pose the question to you…is cheating the new normal?? Is monogamy becoming a thing of the past?

I’ll let this one answer itself 😉

That’s all she wrote.

Advertisements

7 Replies to “Is Cheating the New Normal?”

  1. Great post!

    I know plenty of happy, monogamous couples, so I say no, cheating is not the new normal. (I speak for my generation and group of friends aged from their late 20s to mid 40s, btw.) I’ve eliminated people who denigrate Black men or women with unfair, blanketed statements as well as those who refuse to reflect on the damage they cause to others by not loving and respecting themselves.

    I just think cheating is what gets attention. Happiness in a monogamous partnership won’t get as much attention as say a cheating scandal, right. People love drama and if that’s all that’s in their feed, well, they’re gonna eat it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad you know happy lovers!! Unfortunately I’ve seen the opposite and I cherish the love those few friends/family members of mine actually do have! It’s been in my circle a lot and I’ve seen it at so many ages- I’m just like damn!! Totally agree with that last statement though, attention seekers will unleash anything to build their energy where it lacks. I love love and I appreciate the genuine people who will take the time to nourish it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Right! We live in a microwave society too, so if anything takes too long or interrupts our comfort, it can sometimes seem easier to leave than make it work.

        Like

  2. I think cheating has alot to do with the strength of a person who is cheating. If there is something wrong in their relationship, they should communicate about it and if it can’t be fix,move on.

    Like

    1. I couldn’t agree more. I just hate that it’s becoming more common for both women and men to stay in unfaithful relationships. It used to be soooo trivial, but now it just seems to be accepted.Not saying it’s wrong or right to stay, because people have every right to work their ish out, but it’s just never the same after in my opinion, so it’s puzzling to me.

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s