Somebody said this to me
Somebody’s always saying some sh*t to me..haha
but I thank this someone this time, because once again I am able to shape and shift my viewpoint, think and make a change based on what not only is brought to me but what surrounds me that I may not immediately see
I saw this though
Just ignored it for a while because I was slightly programmed at this point to let it slide
So here I am…chilling..you know..being the conscious, mindful, “woke” sista I am evolving to be and I turn on Love and Hip Hop as I do every week and I’m told “You’re the last person I thought would be watching something like that”
It’s crazy because my immediate reaction is to blanket my real response and be like “What? It’s entertaining”…but this is not the first time I’ve heard this comment and definitely wouldn’t have been the last
It makes me proud of myself actually – to hear that people see something in me that would make them think that I would not subject my mind to this type of media – but it also wakes me up to listen to those people too…
I thought about it this time…because as the show went on and I watched my people take us back a few steps scene by scene and fight by fight…I realized that the puppetry we saw way back when still takes place here
Just changed it formed
I became uninterested
In my mind I placed myself on the show and I felt embarrassed
Some of these public figures have kids and god forbid my mother take part in something like this? Oh naw…
Last night I watched a women who bared a child out of wedlock with a married man be deemed inappropriate by the man….the married man y’all…
Who’s wrong? The both of you. However what transpired there? Patriarchy at it’s finest…but…convo for another post (cuz you know I will rant)
I watched a pregnant woman’s unborn child be ignored by the potential father because of the uncertainty of paternity rather than adults figuring the shit out (cuz this is the 21st century and you certainly can) first and asking questions later
I watched 2 married women cry and bond over the fact that their husband’s had cheated…MULTIPLE TIMES…and the pain…oh the pain..they have daughters who will watch that scene one day
So basically I just watched a lot of sh*t…nothing out of the ordinary
I mean I’ve kept up with this show for years…even hosted watch parties surrounding each season (laugh at me now)
but the shit is exhausting
To keep up with these lives that are portrayed as glamorous and lavish…and oh they are produced by a sista herself
I mean I get it – stories need to be told – but I’ll pick out a good documentary next time
I just can’t anymore
I’ve cut a lot of old habits over the last couple of years…what’s one more?
I don’t even pay for cable for a reason…so I might as well utilize that headspace
My mom hated when I would watch this anyway…and we know ma knows best – shoutout to you ma!
but I digress and I’m almost done I promise
I did some research…
and uncovered the rankings
Love and Hip Hop Atlanta snagged the #1 spot in a 2016 weekly top 25 list of series premiers…this was during the 2016 summer olympics which ranked below #21…black people did GREAT things this past summer in the olympics…but how many of us were watching that? Not #1 ranked enough of us (hhaha horrible grammar there)
but you see???
Makes my black a** think…
Roxanne Gay (my faveeeee author right now) kinda touched on this a little in her book “Bad Feminist” and she admitting to being in the same boat
Seeing how terrible the storylines were for our people in this show…yet continually tuning in every week.
So *DISCLAIMER* (as I say per usual) I am not judging anyone else for not coming to the same conclusion
I wonder what decision, if any, she made after that
Ok ok ok.
So to the point
I’m re-programming my “tv-mind” to fall in line with the rest of me
I’ll miss the ratchetness – but sh*t , I’ll read a new book or something in the mean time.
XOXO – Ams